Thursday, October 15, 2009

Mad! Mad! Mad!

Hi Y'all,
I wish that I could post an amazingly grace and spirit filled devotion today, but the truth is I can't. I am not feeling grace or spirit filled myself right now. I am angry!
No, I am MAD!

Mike went down to Fort Jackson last night...was sent to the wrong hotel...after finally getting to the right hotel, waking at 3:45 this morning and going over to Fort Jackson....he was informed that our recruiter had not sent the proper forms and Mike was not on the docket.

In other physical!

Time off of work...for nothing.
Gas to and from Fort Jackson...for nothing.
People getting up at 4:00 this morn to pray for Mike's physical...seems to be wasted.
(I know prayer is never wasted....but it seems that way today.)

The best we can hope for is that he can get a call next week.

Here's the thing...we need to get in the Army or God needs to provide one of us with a full time job!

I fully believe that God takes care of His children. I fully believe that He will not allow us to go hungry. I am scared where He may take us down to however. Will we have to sell our home because we can't pay for it? Will we have to sell my antiques just so we can pay bills?'s that serious.
I am thinking about putting a Victrola I have dated between 1915 and 1920 up for sale. It is in great shape. Its a table top, hand crank Victrola with records. It still works!

God has never let me down...even when I was a Semester/Innovator missionary in my 20's. I was only getting $50 a month from what was then known as the Southern Baptist Home Mission Board. God provided...never got in dept.

I have to believe He will do it again.

What if He don't?

What if we lose our house?

Like Those three heroes of old standing before the fiery furnace...Even if He doesn't I will still serve Him.

Thanks for letting me vent.

Maybe now I can give grace and feel the Spirit's own forgiveness in my life today.

I love you


My ADHD Me said...

We ALL need to vent at some time or another. Isn't it wonderful that we can sit down at our computer and VENT VENT VENT and know that we have friends out there that really care!

I just said I prayer for you.

(I never say I am GOING to pray for someone. I have to stop and do it right then. Otherwise I be assured, the prayer was said)


mpz3 said...

Hey sweetie,

I love you so much. THank you for always being willing to stay by my side and do what's best for our family. No matter what God does, I also believe He will see us through it. Remember the statement, "If God brings you to it, then HE'll always see you through it."

As we grow together,
Mr. I

Anonymous said...

Pam, thank you for your post today. It's good to know other Christians have that fear of what God will allow us to go through in order to give us what we need; That is my largest spiritual obstacle.

I'm so sorry to hear about your serious situation. I will surely be praying for you and your family.

So glad I found your blog; I'll definitely be back. See you on FB.

Your sister in Christ,
Wendy James

On Purpose said...

Dear Jesus this is your girl, Pamela, crying out the truth of her heart...I feel blessed to have witnessed this...for there is such freedom in the truth...for when we cry out to You...when we feel weak and in desperate need of Your biggness You show up...thank You Lord for the provision that will carry this family on this journey! Amen!

Kristen Myers said...

Pamela, I don't even know what to say except that I am with you and your family, no matter what happens.

Lifting our head can be so hard sometimes. I guess that's why He's called the lifter!!

Love ya and praying for you,

Kay Martin said...

Bless you,

Every time I hear a news broadcaster or a politician talk about the improving economy I am hit by all the great people needing a job and nothing is working out for them. Yes, God is here with you. What will you go through in this dark economic time? What will be the next chapter for any of us? I don't have any wisdom, but know that you are among many and I am praying for a breakthrough for you. My heart is aching with you.

Somehow I believe your honest heart is being a great help to many who do not know how intimate and real God calls us to be when we are going through these trials.

Lord...I agree with all who are praying a for a fulltime job for both of them as soon as possible.

Love you so.