I looked at the website, a tear slowly crept out of the corner of my eye and fell on the keyboard. For 5 years I had looked at the site, hoping, praying, wondering and yes, even crying with desire to go, but knowing that I was not worthy. Who was I kidding?
Then, through a series of events including God having Lysa TerKeurst tell my husband to make me go. I attended my first She Speaks conference http://shespeaksconference.com/4 years ago. Terrified does not even begin to describe the elephant dance that was going on in my tummy. Forget butterflies! I prayed, I cried, I told my husband Mike I was NOT going! He put me in the car, kissed me, and said, "See ya Sunday afternoon." He had taken Lysa seriously!
God took Lysa seriously too! HE showed up! I was touched in so many ways physically and spiritually. I was blessed by the speakers, challenged, encouraged and even got to wear Zoe Elmore's hot pink pumps! Rachel Olson and Zoe held me up in the shoes I had always dreamed of having on my feet. Cerebral palsy does not allow for pretty shoes. God taught me through this experience that helplessness is where HE sometimes needs us to be.
That year God used She Speaks to change my life! I am a better speaker, my ministry has grown, but not like my flesh would have hoped. I still only have 2-3 engagements a year. Believe me when I tell you...that is not why I go! If your only goal is to sell your ministry, book, or network yourself...you will accomplish those goals at She Speaks, but you will miss out on far richer blessings. Go and meet Jesus there! I come home refreshed from being in HIS prescience. Every year I have heard from HIM! Fallen more in love with HIM! And understood HIS love for me in new and extreme ways!
I have attended 3 of the last 4 She Speaks conferences, and God has SHOWN UP to work in me, to me and through me! Last year I could not afford to attend because of financial reasons. I cried and prayed, but there was no way to pay for the conference. As the days drew near, my heart ached to be there. A few weeks before the conference God opened a window. A friend from Arizona posted that she would be attending. I asked her if she needed a ride from the airport. She said yes! I ended up picking up and shuttling 2 wonderful ladies to the conference and back to the airport! Finally, I was able to give to this conference instead of just receiving! It was a blessing! Though I missed the conference sessions and the complete experience. I feel I was able to live out and give away the blessings that had been given to me.
This year too our finances are tight. I am not sure I will be able to attend. Lysa has offered scholarship on her blog http://lysaterkeurst.com/ and I like many others am hoping to win. More so I am praying that God will supply by HIS grace a chance to go and meet HIM there again. I do know this...whether I attend or not...I again will shuttle ladies to and from the airport. I want to live out loud the blessing I have received from being a part of this ministry..all the while wearing my HOT PINK SHOES!